Tuesday, 19 May 2009

Rubbish Portraits

I've tried something new this week. It was 'im indoors birthday and seeing as hand made cards are generally the way to go in our house, was seeking inspiration... and what better inspiration than the rubbish pile that is sat in the corner of my office, threatening to topple at any moment and overwhelm half of Hampshire. So. I decided to try my hand at a rubbish portrait. Theres got to be a first time for everything! As for the result - I'm not sure Jonathan Yeo needs to quake in his boots unduly about his position in the circles of high art, but for a first attempt it's not all that..... rubbish?! And spookily, it does actually look just like him.... well a version of him after hitching a lift in the back of the recycling lorry to a skin grafts appointment....maybe ;-)

Today's rubbish picture is made of junk mail leaflets, the local swimming pools' Spring timetable, a Saturday supplement magazine and last years habitat catalogue.

Wednesday, 13 May 2009

Everyone loves a giraffe...

Today is a giraffe day. No particular reason. I just like 'em. They make me laugh. Laughing at a giraffe is reason enough to blog in my books.

Today's rubbish picture consists of herbal tea bags wrappings, food packaging, an old Junior magazine, Sunday's Observer, and a holiday brochure which was quickly ripped up before I could drool all over it thereby ruining perfectly good bits of blue....

Thursday, 7 May 2009

Coffee o' clock

This year I turned over a new leaf. In theory I am now a green, lean, healthy, recycling artist machine. I don't smoke, I don't drink... erm much, I don't eat meat, I practise aikido every week, I'm marching daily around the fields of Hampshire with the dog whether he wants to or not, breathing in deep lungfuls of clean crisp country air, I have become zen like in the art of recycling. The leaf has been well and truly turned over to good living. However I have discovered a flaw in my plan. A little hiccup.

It seems I have a major addiction. This morning I thought I'd up things a notch and y'know just give up coffee too. Why not, I thought.... Well here's why not;
My head came close to imploding. My brain throbbed. The goldfish irritated me intensely just by it's very existence. I tsked and tutted my way through my morning routine ... and I lasted until 09.33

Coffee o' clock.
Just a small one.
Oh dear, there's only the pint mug clean out of the dishwasher. That'll have to do then. And then.... aaaaaaaaaah. All is well in the world once more.

ok so I may not have managed complete good living but life is good.

Todays rubbish picture consists of plastic fruit bags. (why put fruit in plastic bags?) Some junk mail and a Boden catalogue. They always seem to send me 3. I should just ask them not to but they do use such nice colours...

Wednesday, 6 May 2009

Day of the Triffids

I have a giant triffid growing in my garden. It looks like innocent rhubarb (but of the enormously massive freaky sized variety) and I swear it grows an inch every time you turn your back on it.
This winter it disappeared completely and since it's re emergence from the depths (The vigorous stamping on the spot where it had been last autumn didn't get rid of it for good as I'd thought....) it's grown to a whopping shoulder height already.... in just a matter of weeks!
I'm ever so slightly concerned it may well turn out to be carnivorous, the kids are looking particularly healthy and outdoorsey at the moment - am I tempting fate by leaving it be within striking distance of the sandpit?!

Anyone who knows Alan Titchmarsh or indeed anyone who knows anything about freaky giant potentially carnivorous rhubarb please feel free to get in touch with some tips n' tricks.

I swear it growled at the dog this morning....

Today's blog rubbish picture is a hastily put together watchdog-esque look a like Triffid consisting rather appropriately of a garden centre catalogue and various scraps of recycled food packaging and fabric.